Redemption
by Sparrows Magician
Summary: Pre-quel to 'Bliss'. Morgana has returned, a vision driving her to seek forgiveness from Arthur. With the help of those around her and the strength within herself Morgana discovers how little she knows about the great Emrys, and how much she truly loves him. The power to change destiny drives this story.
1. A Vision

Her knees ache from kneeling in front of her pratty brother. Two guards stand to either side of her body, spears pointed at her throat. She will not back down, she needs this, she, unfortunately, needs him.

"Why are you here Morgana?"

Her jade eyes will not back down, but she will not move from her place on the floor. She needs him to know that she was ready to submit.

"I have told you Arthur. I have seen the error of my ways and-"

"Do you really think I will buy that? After all you have done? Do you think me a fool?"

She closes her eyes and takes a deep breath. She needs to gain his trust, get on his good side. She opens her eyes, trying to convey the remorse she…partially feels.

"I know you do not trust me Arthur, I cannot blame you. I will do anything you ask of me. There are things I have seen…visions of a better world. I don't want to go down a path that will bring _our_ demise."

"What do you mean _our_?"

She looks at him pleadingly. Her eyes go gold and all swords are out pointing at her. Merlin is next to the king, his eyes gold and ready to take Morgana out if need be.

"_You are on the battlefield with Mordred. Your sword is clashing with all the rebels around you. Mordred finally comes up close to you. His sword comes out and makes contact with your stomach. You dub over in pain. I scream out to you and with the last of my magic I push Mordred to the ground. You are bleeding everywhere. The fairies come for you, bringing you to Avalon. They tell me I am to be the protector of your body. You sleep now, only to return in the next life"_

Her eyes go back to her normal jade color and she looks to the ground, small drops of water running down her cheeks.

"I have seen your demise, and I do not wish for it. Somehow…actually seeing you die breaks my heart."

She looks at him and for a moment the emotion of longing is reflected between brother and sister.

"I know I have much to make up for, but I am ready now. I have let my hatred and anger control my life for so long. Please, _King Arthur_, I beg of you to give me another chance. If you must strip me of everything and throw me in with the peasants so be it, but I will regain your trust. I will show you that I have changed."

Queen Guinevere looks to King Arthur with much skepticism, but also a hint of hope. The queen has always desired Morgana's return, even though she is weary, she still wishes to save her once lady. Arthur looks to his right, Merlin is seething. On no level does he trust anything she says. She is a liar and a monster. She has made all magic users into exactly what Uther preached against. He is the only one that has changed Arthur's mind.

Arthur considers both reactions. Both are weary, but his wife is willing to forgive. As much has he's come to trust and love Merlin…he is not his wife. Guinevere is his heart and compassion, Merlin his head. Today he must follow his heart instead of his head.

"I will permit you to return."

There is a universal gasp from the on lookers. All the nobles and knights brace themselves. They did not expect this decision.

"You will stay in the dungeon until I see fit to release you. When that time has come we will cross the bridge of your status. Also, you will give up Mordred to us. If you really want to prove yourself to me you will give me the man you have _seen_ kill me."

Morgana looks down, ringing her hands in front of her face. She does not want to give Mordred up. He has been a good friend and close ally in this great time of need. She looks to her brother, her face a mask of pain. This is not what she wants. He looks at her and realizes that he is asking her to betray the only person she is loyal to at this time. He looks to the side, reserved.

"You do not need to tell us now, but you must give up his location in two weeks time. If you do not, I will have no qualms about executing you."

The guards hoist her up and carry her down to the dungeons. Arthur dismisses everyone but Merlin.

"What do you think?"

Merlin gives him a mocking gesture.

"What do I think? Seriously, Arthur? This is _not_ a good idea. I mean really man she is obviously plotting something. You know she is going to try to kill you sooner than later. What could _possibly_ stop her from taking you out at this point?"

"You."

It was a simple statement, but spoke volumes of how far their relationship has come. Merlin deflates a little.

"Ok look Arthur, I know you want your sister back, I understand, but you can't trust this."

"Merlin, I know where you're coming from but I'm putting her in the binding dungeon."

For a moment Merlin's breathing hitches. Even though he wants justice for some reason, knowing she is going to be going through a horrific experience as the binding cell upsets him.

"When are you sending her there?"

"Now, and I want you to watch her go in, make sure it works."

Merlin nods and leaves the king. Arthur sits alone on his throne for a minute longer by himself, _what has he done?_

* * *

It was awful watching her walk through the cell. The second she stepped through the threshold she dubbed over in pain. Her magic came out of her in golden ribbons and swirled into the ceiling, settling there. A torture to know your magic is so close but always out of reach. He only looks at her from the doorway for now. He knows she will not sleep well that night.

He goes to her the first few days and she is as angry as ever. She screams and throws anything she can get her hands on. She paces around him in circles, when he sits on the small stool in the middle of the room.

"Will you calm down?"

"Will you try to kill me again?"

She is always mocking him. He sometimes comes with Arthur, the king wants to see her progress. In front of Arthur she is different, not necessarily she is playing him but more scared of his reactions.

"How are you fairing down here Morgana?"

"Fine your majesty."

Every question is answered as politely and respectfully as possible. When Arthur leaves, however, she is back to acid retorts and saucy comments. He always finds himself running from her dungeon after only a few minutes.

It is about a month in when he comes to her cell, and realizes she has calmed down. She is sitting near the small window, her magic swirling above them. She seems, different. She looks over at him, those jade eyes of hers, so mysterious.

"How do we feel today Morgana?"

"Well I slept on a cement floor, I have a bed pan in full in the corner, and I felt frigid under the pathetic excuse I have for blankets. Oh I'm sorry am I supposed to say splendid!"

She was mocking him, but it was different, he felt different.

"Ok so I'm assuming you will not give your quarters a glamorous review?"

"How clever you are _Emrys. _Honestly, I should be at least allowed a bath. You do not treat prisoners correctly."

She huffs at him from the bench in the corner, crossing her arms in her haughty fashion. Still something is different.

"Something is different about you today Morgana."

"You mean the smell?"

They both smile in spite of themselves, in spite of the situation.

"I mean that something is going on with you. Did you have a vision?"

She looks a bit startled, and clenches her hands in front of her. She looks him in the eye and takes a deep breath.

"I've had the same vision that has plagued me for over a year."

"The one of Arthur's demise?"

She shakes her head.

"No, the one of my life."

"Your life?" The great sorcerer is bewildered.

"Yes, I told Arthur I wanted to come back because I wanted to save his life. That is partially true…but I also wanted to come back because of a different vision I've had."

"What was the vision about?"

She looks reluctant, but sends him a small smile anyway.

"I've been having visions of a baby."

"A baby?"

She laughs at his confusion.

"Yes you slow minded buffoon a baby."

He wants to come back with a harsh retort, but the sound of her laughter stops him. She is opening up. He shouldn't do anything to spoil this.

"What do you see in the vision?"

"It is simple. I am in a luxurious room sitting in a chair with the babe in my arms. I am rocking him and the only things I can see is a parchment addressed to me, 'Morgana High Priestess of Camelot.' I know it's a foolish wish but every time I see those words my heart swells. The babe is beautiful. I coo to him and tell him how happy I am to have come back to Camelot."

Merlin smiles at the vision, it sounds like a good dream.

"Do you know who the father is?"

"No, I only see me and the babe, but I know he is mine. I can feel it down to my fingertips."

"That is the real reason you came back?"

She looks hesitant but gives in to his questions.

"Yes that is the true reason. I want to make this vision come to pass. I want a good life. The only other things I see are of you killing me and Mordred killing Arthur."

Merlin nods and realizes it is time for lunch. He gets up quickly and exits her dungeon, looking back once to see her magic swirl around and pulse above their heads.

* * *

"So that's why she came back? Because she wants to have a baby?"

Arthur and Merlin are talking inside of his and Gwen's chambers, the queen sitting on the bed playing with Tom.

"I know it sounds ludicrous, but I believe her."

"So she is willing to give up the throne for a non-existent child but not to save me."

"She says that vision plays a factor but not as much."

"Children change you." Gwen says from the bed.

Both men turn to look at the queen who is playing with Tom. She looks at both of them and continues.

"Motherhood is the greatest thing to ever happen to a woman. A child is the physical representation of love between a man and a woman. Morgana wants that representation. She loves you Arthur, but she loves love more."

Both men look at her bewildered.

"Guinevere, not that I don't respect your opinion, but why the change of heart? Don't you loath Morgana…she did try to kill our son."

Gwen looks to Tom, rubbing his head affectionately.

"I would kill her if she ever hurt my son. The fact is that she hasn't. Morgana came here on her knees begging for forgiveness. I just don't want us to make the same mistakes your father did when it comes to those with magic."

Both men stared at the queen in awe. Sometimes, her compassion and love were bigger and more glorious than either man could comprehend.

**_Fin._**

**Ok so blame _sfsf_ for this. _Sfsf_ asked to know when Morgana told Merlin about her dreams and Balinor. So now your stuck with a multi-chapter fic, MUAHAHAHAH. It's nine chapters long and I'll be updating either every couple of days or whatever. It's finished and I can't help myself but put them out:D Anywho, Hope you enjoyed the first chapter! This is, of course, apart of the Bliss universe, but its the prequel. Its leading up to the knowledge of the baby, their marriage, and everything else...also if you know me you know there will be sexy times...so be excited! Enjoy! Happy Reading! **

**Hope to hear from you guys soon:)**


	2. Just A Little Alone Time

"I want to spend alone time with Arthur."

Morgana is standing in the throne room, it has been two weeks since she has been released from the dungeons and already she is making an outrageous request. Gwen grabs Arthur and stands between him and Morgana. She may believe Morgana is attempting to change, but she does not fully trust the woman either.

"Why would we allow that? We all know how powerful you are." Gwaine speaks from the sides.

All the knights are lined up to the left, ready to protect their king. Morgana looks down submissively and knows she must handle this with care.

"If it will put your minds at ease Merlin may accompany us at all times. I just want time to talk with my brother."

Arthur looks to Merlin. The man in question is staring hard at Morgana. Arthur sighs. He supposes that he will be making a very unpopular decision.

"Since you have given up Mordred and his allies to us, I will grant this request, we will go out riding tomorrow, you, me and Merlin."

There are shouts all around the room. Arthur puts his hand up to silence everyone.

"I know my decision is unpopular, but hear me my people. My…sister has come to me looking for forgiveness. I must honor her and make sure she is given the opportunity to redeem herself. We may not have caught Mordred, but we have gotten some of the people she has given up to us. If she wishes for time alone with me, then so be it." He looks straight at her now, "Morgana, you know I do not fully trust you yet, but I will make an attempt. You have shown that you understand the weariness of the court and have allowed me to take my most powerful weapon on these rides together, Merlin. For your consideration, we will ride out tomorrow."

Everyone feels more at ease with this idea, but Merlin. The last thing he wants to do was be the person to kill the Lady Morgana.

* * *

"You're going to spend alone time with her?" Merlin almost screams at Arthur.

"I've talked to over with Guinevere and we both think Morgana has proven herself. It has been three months since her release from the dungeon, over half a year since her return. I need time alone with her so I can know without a doubt that I can trust her again."

"Arthur, come on! She may be sunshine to you but to me she is always spouting venom."

"Can't really blame her…I mean you did poison her _Merlin_."

"Oh great now you're on that? I was doing it for Camelot _Arthur_…didn't want to do it in the first place."

Arthur chuckles at the exasperation on Merlin's face.

"Look Merlin everyone knows _why_, even Morgana isn't upset with you-"

"Yea tell yourself that, she mocks me for it every time were alone together."

"And even if she is, that is a problem between you and her. You two need to deal with that, I for one will try to build a relationship with my sister."

"So when she kills you…which I'm sure she will try to. Don't come crying to me."

"…Merlin that doesn't make sense, if she kills me how can I come to you?"

"You could haunt me like a ghost!"

Arthur stares at him, the look of _you Merlin are an idiot_ written clearly across his face.

"You, Merlin, are an idiot." Or he could say it, either way.

The great sorcerer just huffs his way out, he has had enough of this.

* * *

"You shouldn't be here dressed like that."

She is wearing that sinful red night gown and the tempting sheer black robe over it. They make her look dangerous and beautiful. Why did he agree to help her with her healing and seer magics again? _Because you sir, are a sucker for __**a**__ beautiful woman…_stupid Nimueh voice.

"Why not oh High Sorcerer? Do you not like my outfit?"

He stares at his book hard. When he agreed to this he didn't expect her to invade his bed chambers late at night in her sleep wear…it was too distracting.

She giggles at his red cheeks and hands him the book she was reading, he catches a glimpse of her naked wrist, her veins pumping under her skin. For a moment he wonders what would happen if he sucks on her pulse.

"Merlin?"

He comes out of his daze and looks back at the book in front of him.

"What?"

"You have not said anything for ten minutes now, oh you high king of punch lines."

He gives her a pointed look.

"I do not feel the need to exercise my intellect in front of you."

"Mainly because you have none."

"Says the woman who came to me for lessons in magic."

"Yes well we all know your magic is instinctual, can you even read Merlin?"

He holds the book up and points to the first word.

"The."

She scowls.

"You know this would be much more pleasant if you were more cooperative, I feel like every time I ask you a question you take five minutes to debate if you will answer."

"I do take five minutes to debate if I will answer."

She glares.

"I guess you are just always going to be better at killing people then helping them."

"I guess you're going to be as saucy as always. Oh please Morgana, the next time you feel the need to tie someone up don't forget to call me. That mind control thing really helped cleanse my brain of anything important."

"Of course it did Merlin, now you're left with nothing in your head but air."

"Explain to me again why you've come to seek help from such an 'air head'?"

She has her hands on the table and is hovering close to him. He matches her, their faces are close and they lock themselves in combat.

"I must be a fool to always seek out your help. I did it once and look where it got me? Lies and misguidance. You claim to be so wonderful but not once did you try to save me."

"You sound so sure, when in fact I gave Morgause the information needed to heal you of the poison. I also healed you when you feel down those stairs."

"Oh those stairs that you _magicked_ me down?"

Their teeth are bared to each other, both parties holding back their magic from pushing at the other. After a breath they pull away.

"I think were done for the night Morgana."

She nods and slips out not a second later.

_This is going to be difficult indeed…_

* * *

She is back the next night. No matter how much venom is spat between each party she always comes back the next night. He smiles at his parchment.

* * *

"I hate you."

"Now who's the liar?"

Morgana smiles at the book she is reading. It has been six months since she has been practicing her magics with Merlin. She feels so at ease in his tower now, it has taken time but slowly their getting to a good place, doesn't stop her from throwing out a few evil words to rile him up every now and then. She so does love to see him all red faced.

He sits there with his head down, scribbling away at the parchment. Waiting for any and all questions she will throw at him this afternoon. He is frustrated with this piece of legislation, he is writing more regulations on magic usage and it has gotten to the point where he is aggravated.

He scrunches up the paper and throws it into the trash bin. She sees his irritation and looks him in the eye. He holds her gaze for a brief moment before he looks down in exhaustion.

"Why do I have to write these things Morgana? If they're not perfect I'm bound to upset either the magical community or the non-magical community."

"Well you can always magic yourself into a chicken and fly away?"

"Not helping." He is rubbing his fingers over his eyes.

She laughs merrily and goes to sit on his desk. He hears the thump and looks up at her new perch next to him. He gives her a disapproving look, leans back and sighs.

"What is the parchment supposed to be about?" He looks at her, fatigued.

"It is supposed to be a restriction of rituals. The problem is some involve human and animal sacrifice, and those are actually really important to the magical community. Also, if the person is willing to sacrifice themselves for good harvests and to prevent droughts, who am I to say that it is wrong?"

She thinks for a moment.

"An animal does not have the ability to decide if they want to be sacrificed or not."

Merlin looks up at her befuddled.

"You're worried about the animals?"

"I'm just saying that you are worried if people make the choice to be sacrificed, well animals do not have a choice. So if your problem is with choosing, you should say that unless given explicit confirmation, and put into writing by both parties sacrifices cannot be made, and I guess there are magic users who can talk to animals so they can get the confirmation if need be."

Merlin gapes in astonishment by the simplicity of the solution.

"That could work…"

He dazes off and Morgana leans on her hand towards him to look at the parchment. He makes the mistake of looking at her and gulps. The angle of her body gives him a delectable view of her cleavage. He sucks in a breath. He should not be lusting after her in such a way. When did this woman find the time to enchant him so?

**_Fin._**

**So there is chapter 2 woohoo! I was gonna wait until tomorrow to publish this but I got a lot of alerts and favorites in my e-mail and I just couldn't resist:) You guys are the best! I hope to hear from more of you with this chapter!...also I know it seems a little rushed with the timeline, but I just don't want to do a lot of filler chapters, I'd rather get straight to the point...I'm not a good filler person haha. Anyway...**

**Hope to hear from you soon! Keep those awesome reviews coming!**

**And a special shout out to Meri Ley, who has reviewed every single one of my news stories, your so wonderful:)**

**And Sfsf for the awesome idea, as always thanks for reading!**


	3. Marry Me

"I think it's time Arthur."

The king is elated. He cannot wait to tell Morgana about Merlin's recommendation. The woman in question is sitting by herself in her bed chambers when the guards summon her to the court room, there she hears the news. The smile on her face is beyond words.

Two weeks later she enters the throne room in a beautiful silver gown. The nobles have come from all ends of the kingdom to honor her. Ahead of her is Merlin, standing regal in his red High Sorcerer robes, ceremonial staff in his hand. The pole so beautiful, made from the finest oak tree, rubies, emeralds and sapphires create an intricate spiral from the bottom to the top and at the head rests a beautiful, diamond, a wonderful masterpiece for ceremonies, not so wonderful for fighting he always tells her.

Arthur is on his left, Guinevere on his right, both adorn in their coronation clothing. The Knights off to the right in their ceremony cloths, all of them at attention and ready to receive the king's sister. Morgana takes a deep breath as she walks down the aisle toward the three, their smiles contagious to all the nobility and knights in the room.

She is in an elegant silver dress made of the finest silks, and the beautiful head band that goes across her forehead is decorated with small crystals to show her standing as a priestess. Two of Merlin's apprentices come up and adorn her with a golden robe around her beautiful silver dress. The great sorcerer steps down. He motions for the boys to give her the box.

Inside is a dagger, one from the old religion. Magics have woven themselves into the blade, and Merlin himself has enchanted the piece. She smiles at him and he returns the sentiment. She kneels to him and her rulers. Merlin's staff comes down to her shoulder.

"Morgana Pendragon, priestess, sorceress and princess of Albion. Do you take this dagger and all its magic and swear to uphold the laws of Albion and protect the people of this realm with all the gifts and magics you posses?"

His voice is strong, her eyes glow at the ground. She looks up, feeling her power pulsate.

"I swear by the Old Religion and the new."

Merlin smiles.

"Then rise, Morgana Pendragon, High Priestess of Camelot!"

She rises, Merlin comes forward, his eyes the same gold as hers. Their hands come up and touch palm to palm and a pulse of magic shoots out and small dragons of fire start flying around the room.

There is a loud cheer from the crowd, but for a moment the two magical beings do not hear them. Their eyes are focused on each other.

* * *

"Everyone please I have a wonderful announcement to make."

Everyone at the feast stops their chatter for a moment to gaze upon the king.

"My sister, Lady Morgana and High Priestess of Camelot has decided to join the houses of Pendragon and Averill by marrying Lord Kenway."

Merlin tenses from his side of the table. His eyes sadden when Morgana takes Kenway's hand and he kisses her knuckles. Lady Morgana is glowing. The smile on her face is unparalleled. The great sorcerer closes his eyes, knowing this battle was over, and he didn't even get a chance to fight.

* * *

She corners him in his bed chambers a week after the announcement of her engagement, his hands full of books.

"You're avoiding me."

He can't see over the top of the stack but he knows her voice…he always knows her voice.

"No I'm not."

She takes his books and puts them on the side table. She turns suddenly, fierceness in her eyes.

"Yes you are, don't lie to me!"

"OK I am, but what of it. I'm allowed to avoid people."

There is an awkward silence.

"Why?"

"Why what?"

"Ugh you infuriating little man!" She grabs his tunic and brings him level with her, her eyes blazing.

"Tell me." She seethes at him.

He's off balance, his hands shoot out trying to level his body. She is glaring daggers and he feels like he is seven again and his mother is yelling at him for turning the dog purple.

"Don't marry him." He says simply his shoulders slumping in defeat.

"Why?" She doesn't seem so shocked by his words. He continues.

"Marry me."

She releases him and he stands up right, just staring at her. She is not surprised or stunned at what he has said. If anything she glares harder.

"Why?"

He is as still as she is. She releases him but is still invading his space. He stands up fully.

"Because you know I love you."

She stands her ground, her head in the air, challenging him…always challenging him. The fire to his ice.

"Morgana come on. You are the most infuriating, stubborn woman I have ever met. And did I mention you tried to kill me a bunch of times?"

She glares harder, his shoulders slump.

"I…for some unknown reason…love all those things about you. Even if you did try to kill me for some reason my brain just registers that I was on your mind and that should be enough."

She grabs his ears, and locks him into the most soul wrenching kiss of his life. It only lasts a second, and then she releases him.

"Fine."

And that was that.

* * *

"You want to marry her?"

"Yes Arthur."

"And she…wants to marry you."

"Yes Arthur."

It was the two of them, riding out into the forest. Arthur demanded some time with his friend since the whole "you need to get married" fiasco. He wants to make sure he's still on good terms with his sorcerer.

"Since when?"

"I dunno mate. I seriously don't know how it happened…but somehow I fell in love with Morgana."

"Morgana…as in my sister? As in the woman you have been at odds with since her return?"

"Not at odds…"

"The same woman you've been trying to kill?"

"Hey she's tried to kill me too!"

Arthur gives Merlin the most confused look, the sorcerer has to stop himself from doubling over into laughter.

"What?" Merlin chuckles.

"Sorry, Merlin, I just don't get you sometimes. There are moments when I think I know what goes on in that thick head of yours, and then you throw something like this down on me. I mean really man how am I supposed to react?"

"You're supposed to trust me and know my feelings are real, and that I love your sister, Lady Morgana, and wish to marry her."

They trot in silence for a moment.

"She has agreed."

"She said 'Fine'."

Arthur smiles at this.

"I'll have to tell Kenway the wedding is off…he will not be pleased."

"I know, I'm sorry Arthur."

The king turns to him now.

"Well you can thank me by mucking out my stables."

"Seriously Arthur? I'm not your manservant anymore…I'm a lord now."

"I know, that's what makes it so much fun! Also, you can't use magic."

"What? Come on now."

"Nope, no magic. Just good ol' hard labor. You remember what that was like don't you Mer_lin_?"

* * *

"You smell awful."

Merlin gives Morgana a pointed look when he enters his bed chambers. Apparently she has already made herself at home.

"I had to muck out your brother's stables, which was my penance for asking to marry you and taking you away from Lord Kenway."

"Well I think that is a small price to pay for having such a delectable woman as your bride!"

She is acting haughty tonight. Merlin just sighs, hands on the table glaring at the wood work, _what have I gotten myself into?_

He looks up and back over to her. She is smiling from her seat, her legs thrown over the armrest, no shoes on under her green velvet dress, he can see her toes so no stocking, book nestled into her lap. The moonlight is soft over her ivory skin, and once again, without trying, Morgana has rendered Merlin speechless. He sends her a reserved smile. He slowly walks over to her, leaning on the small table next to her chair. She looks up at him with those beautiful emerald eyes and he can't help himself from smiling.

"Do you really want this Morgana? Do you really want to marry me?"

She shifts to stand in front of him, her book left on the chair. Her delicate hand comes out to grab his, and for a moment she just stares at their joint limbs.

"I think so, do you?"

Her eyes are vulnerable, nervous. Their love, it is so new, so fresh. He takes a deep breath and feels as if they've done this all out of order. He knows she's scared, after everything that has happened he _knows_. He laces their fingers together and brings their joint limbs to his lips, kissing the back of her hand.

"I think so."

She smiles at him, the moment special, fragile. They do not want it to break. She feels the need to say something else, to reassure him, _to reassure them both_.

"Milady?" Angela enters.

Morgana turns, for a moment she realizes how lovely her new maid is so she sneaks a glance at Merlin, but he has not stopped looking at their joint hands. Even in the presence of this beautiful young woman, he can look nowhere else but at Morgana. She smiles at the sentiment.

"Yes Angela?"

"Are you ready for me to take you to your chambers?"

Merlin looks at Morgana. Soon this will be her chambers. His hand slides up to her wrist, her fingers move to settle on his pulse. For tonight though, tonight she must retire to a lonely bed away from this man.

"Yes Angela I am ready."

Merlin looks at her longingly. Has she made the right decision?

"Good night, Milord."

He sucks in a breath, she notes his pulse quickens beneath her fingertips, his adams apple bob, and she could swear his pupils are dilated. She will have to make a note to use his title more often.

Angela holds the door open for Morgana as she crosses the room. She looks over her shoulder and gives Merlin a small smile before exiting. The last thing the warlock hears is the clink of the lock.

"Good night…Milady."

**_Fin._**

**So...I'm going to be evil and post this thing while ya'll sleep...MUAHAHAH. :) I hope its a good morning wake up for you guys! I was gonna post it later today but my friend and I were using my computer to watch awesome movies...so yea haha. I know I stuck a scene from Elemental in here but it was necessary. I debated doing it, but it didn't flow correctly otherwise. I also stole a little inspiration for 'Sherlock', do you guys know where? I hope you do:) Also for those of you who haven't read Elemental it explains the whole "you have to marry" fiasco. I didn't think that was important enough for this chapter, so I left it out but mentioned it cuz yea it worked. **

**Anywho, you know what that review button is for! Happy reading! :)**


	4. Saying I Do Is Not Comforting

"Stop pacing."

"I can't stop pacing."

"Mer_lin_."

The great sorcerer has been making holes in the tile for the last hour. Arthur just rolls his eyes, is this how their relationship is going to be? Everyone on pins and needles forever?

"Where is she?"

The warlock is looking out into the court yard. Morgana has not shown up yet and he is very nervous. He thought after being in Camelot for two years a marriage to him wouldn't be her downfall…but what if she has fled? What IF their relationship is the breaking point and she cannot go through with it? What if-

"You can stop that you know."

Arthur has, once again, interrupted Merlin's chain of thought.

"Stop what?"

"Merlin, you've bitten your nails almost down to the tip, you're pacing like mad, I know what is going through your mind. I am a married man if you've forgotten."

"Yes but you sire are the king of prattiness and could handle being left at the alter because you will still be the center of attention. I on the other hand will be humiliated and everyone will see that I am just that unlovable."

Arthur gives him a pointed look, and Merlin looks back at his friend. Bruce stands to the side, waiting for the arrival of the lady and queen. Merlin deflates a little and sits on the edge of the window, away from the courtyard, staring at it anymore will drive him crazy.

"Merlin, she is not even late, you still have another twenty minutes. You need to relax."

Merlin takes a deep breath…he hates this. The waiting is driving him mad.

"I know Arthur its just-"

His breath is caught in his throat. Arthur has a smug smile on his face as he stares at Merlin's open mouth. He turns, knowing exactly who is behind him.

Morgana is walking forward, looking as pure as sin in white. Guinevere walks in next to her, Angela only a few steps behind. Normally they wear beautiful colors to get married in, but as usual, his sister had to do something so bold.

The dress is made of velvet, tight up top and flows down to the floor, the sheer sleeves decorated in crystals. The embroidery over her bodice is that of the Pendragon crest. She has, surprisingly, left her hair down. Her crystal headband adorns her forehead, curtsy of the Old Religion and her standing as High Priestess, her makeup, sharp around the eyes, but soft muted pinks everywhere else. She looks positively beautiful. Arthur will note that the glowing smile on his sister's lips helps make her look more enchanting.

Merlin stands there, dumbfounded. She is like a goddess. The white of her dress speaking volumes of her chastity, and suddenly his palms are sweating…the realization that he will have to make love to her tonight abruptly pops into his head.

"Deep breaths Merlin."

"Arthur…I know it's just that…I just realized…"

The king is not paying attention as he brings his hands out for Morgana to take. She goes to him and embraces him in a hug, the goofy smile never leaving Arthur's features. Merlin is still standing there…dumbfounded. Oh no what is he to do?

"Merlin?" he is brought out of his haze when he hears his name fall beautifully from her lips.

"Are you ok?"

She leaves Arthur and stands before him. His black armor and cloak suddenly feel very tight and heavy. She is in white, he in black, he chuckles at the irony. She is sending him a concerned smile and he remembers how to exhale again. His arm comes out to her and she takes it, a thankful sigh escaping her lips.

"Milady." She smiles, almost shy.

"Milord."

Arthur and Guinevere bid them goodbye and head in for the ceremony, Morgana looks at Merlin nervously, Bruce and Angela exchange anxious glances.

"Are you ready Morgana?" she smiles.

"I've been ready, _Emrys._"

* * *

The feast is grand, and Merlin feels as if his life is unreal, a feast, held in honor of his marriage…to Morgana. Is this a dream?

"Everyone I would like to make a toast," all glasses come up to honor the king, "To the bringing together of Lady Morgana Pendragon, High Priestess and princess of Camelot, and Lord Merlin Alwin, High Court Sorcerer and my best friend. I give you the _first_ of the House of Alwin. To Merlin and Morgana Alwin!"

"To the Alwin's!" The guests' chorus.

The toast and moment surreal to Merlin, his name has just been honored by his king, and his surname now means more than one. He can't help the smile on his face. He looks over at Morgana, she suddenly looks away, nervous, his brow scrunches up.

The knights come up to pat the sorcerer on the back in congratulations, all spirits high for the joyous occasion, her odd behavior dismissed for the moment. Gwaine goes up to Morgana and they smile at each other, their transgressions long since forgotten. He holds a hand out for Morgana to take.

"May I?" He looks at Merlin for confirmation.

He waves a hand and the knight whisks Merlin's new bride off onto the floor. He watches from his spot at the head table as she glides over the floor. He wants desperately to dance with her, but somehow, even though she has said "I do" he still feels inexplicitly nervous around the High Priestess. _Maybe it has something to do with those scared looks she keeps sending you…_stupid mocking Nimueh voice.

"You shouldn't let him do that ya know?"

He turns to look at Leon, the man occupying the empty chair Morgana has been sitting in.

"Oh yea?" Leon smiles at his friend.

"Yes, you know Gwaine has a way of sweeping women off their feet with his dancing skills."

"Yes, but it's when he opens his mouth they start to scurry away."

Leon roars in laughter and pats Merlin on the back, both men smiling at their good humor. Though, Merlin does find himself sneaking glances over at Morgana, she is so elegant the way she moves. A small smile adorns the great warlock's face and Leon notices the change in atmosphere.

"You're scared Milord?" Merlin looks down, a crooked smile coming to his features.

"Still can't get used to you all calling me that."

A smile is passed between them.

"I mean it _Merlin_, are you scared?" The sorcerer looks down.

"I don't know how it happened Leon but somehow I forgot I would have to bed Morgana tonight…I just…yes I'm scared."

The knight looks out to the dance floor, it seems Percival has swooped in and taken the new bride into a dance.

"Do you love her Merlin? Truly love her."

Merlin follows his gaze to the dance floor. She is so happy, her sensual movements, a small smile tugs at his lips.

"I do."

"Then you will be fine my friend. Bedding a woman is nothing more than making love, and if you already love her, then your half way there."

He slaps Merlin on the back and the warlock sends the man a grateful smile. He is left alone again with his thoughts and looks back out to the dance floor, his bride finally making her way back to him. She doesn't say anything as she sits, just looks at him pensively.

He sees her hands shake. She sends him an uneasy glance. Tonight will be difficult indeed.

**_Fin._**

**Yay another chapter for you amazing people! I was gonna publish this yesterday but life got in the way haha. So the timeline is gonna slow down for the last few chapters so ya theres that. A lot of stuff happens after they get married...the next chapter is their 'horrible' first time, I'll let you all be the judge of how horrible it actually is haha.**

**As always thanks again for reading! You know what that review button is for:)**


	5. Horrific Hope

They're alone, no Bruce, no Angela, just the two of them. Angela had asked if Morgana wished to be changed into 'looser' sleep wear tonight, but she had shooed her away, Merlin had done the same to Bruce. He puts his sword down on the table, and takes off his gloves. He notes how much his hands are sweating.

Morgana is standing by the bed, still in her wedding dress. She looks over to him, and for a moment she is as pure and innocent as any woman on their wedding night. He gulps as he looks at his hands, too scared to remove any of his armor. Somehow, besides their wedding vows, they have not uttered a single word to the other. Morgana closes her eyes, wishing he would say something, _anything_.

"You look stunning tonight Morgana."

Her eyes fly open and fall on him. Her breath hitches as she gazes at him. He is making figure eights on the table, attempting to avoid her eyes, those beautiful emerald eyes that will be his downfall.

"Do you need help with your armor Merlin?"

He is startled when she speaks and she is received with a puzzled look.

"I used to help my father."

He nods, both in recognition and acceptance. She comes over to him, nimble fingers undressing him until he is down to his tunic and trousers, both black for the occasion. She places her trembling hands on his chest and touches the material softly.

"Are you scared Morgana?" He whispers above her.

She looks up. Those honest sapphire eyes are half lidded in apprehension.

"I am, are you Merlin?"

His hands nestle on her hips, her body shaking under his fingertips.

"I am."

His lips touch hers softly. He can taste wine and the exotic fruits she ate earlier in her mouth, were they pomegranates? She returns the gesture, small touches pass between them, for the moment it is enough. He pulls back after a while and looks her in the eye, he wishes to do more, but the pensive look she gives him cools his passion.

She gulps as she runs her fingers up and over his neck, her eyes blank, he does not know what she wants, and truthfully neither does she. He kisses her again, and cautiously pushes his tongue into her mouth. She kisses him back, her tongue moving softly with his. He does not know if she is enjoying this, or just doing what he is doing. He pulls back from her a little.

"Is this ok Morgana?" he whispers into her lips.

She nods the look of concern evident in her eyes. He pulls her close again and kisses her softly, his hands finally moving to her back. He plucks at the bottom lace, and she shudders. He knows she is scared, so he attempts to be strong. He is praying to whatever Gods are out there to make this a quick experience (later in his life he will laugh at his naivety).

He pulls and finds one of the threads has snagged. He pulls again, and again, still kissing her in an attempt to distract her from his clumsiness. He finally becomes frustrated and rips the garment. _Oh dear…_

"Merlin!"

She screams at him in surprise. He moves away from her, his hands in the air, her dress ripped up the side. She is going to kill him, the look of murder evident in her eyes. He remembers her telling him how beautiful her wedding dress was, how much she loved it…and he has just ripped it.

"Morgana…I'm…oh God…really I'm…"

For a moment he just stares at her angry face, her cheeks red her creased brow. She looks…adorable, and he can't help himself but smile. He then starts to chuckle and then laugh and she finds it in herself to join in, grabbing her face to hold back her humor.

"I'm sorry Morgana." He gets out between breaths.

She smiles looking down and playing with the tear on her side.

"It's ok. I could have helped you if you'd asked."

"I was scared to ask anything else. You aren't giving me much here."

She bites her lip, and it stirs something inside of Merlin.

"I'm sorry…it's just…"

"You've never done this before either?"

She nods and he brings his hand out to her, a sign of peace. She takes it and he leads her to the bed both sitting on the edge. He gazes at the floor.

"I'm sorry this is so awful for you."

Her head snaps up and she opens her eyes wide.

"No Merlin it's not."

"It's ok Morgana I know it is. I'm just really nervous…I don't really know what I'm doing here."

She looks down dejectedly, and nods. She closes her eyes, praying to the Old Religion for strength.

"Would it help you if I took a piece of clothing off first?" He asks _the floor._

She opens her eyes, grateful for him again.

"Yes, I think it would."

He takes off his tunic, rolling it in front of him. When he looks to his side Morgana is staring hard at his chest, upon closer inspection he believes, hopes, that she is ogling him. He takes her shaky hand and places it on his shoulder. She rubs the skin for a moment. She leans towards him and kisses him soundly on the mouth, his fingers coming up behind her to run over her spine.

Her hand comes up to brush over his chest, playing with the hair on his nipple. He gasps at the feeling of her hands on him and pulls back to take a gulp of air. She bites her lip again, and he feels as if he could become undone at the image. She moves away from him and stands before him, hands ringing in front of her.

"I think…I think I'd like you to help me with my dress now."

She is quiet, shy. He nods dumbly and helps with the torn garment. He stands behind her, his fingers gentle with the laces now. He pushes the garment over her shoulders, down to the floor in a heap. She turns around in her shift, her hands in front of her chest feeling very exposed. It is made of the whitest silks and hugs her perfectly.

She leans in and kisses him, and he rests his hands on her back, but feels her shiver. He moves them up, she trembles more, he moves them to her hips and she is quivering again. He is scared to do anything else to her. He steps back and puts his hand on his trousers, looking to her eyes for approval. She nods and he slips them off, she closes her eyes. He moves to get on the bed, when he remembers he forgot to take his feet out of his trousers, and slips and hits his head on the back of the bed.

"Oww…" He opens an eye to see that she had, of course, decided to open her eyes at that moment.

He is rubbing the back of his head and she starts to laugh. He joins in on the merriment, hoping she will relax a little. She sits on the side of the bed. He wishes she would just climb into the linens with him.

She bites her lip again. She is driving him mad with that. He sees her move her leg up, and push her shift high, his eyes hyper focused on the material. It comes to rest at her hips. He gulps and watches as she takes one of her stockings off, and he wonders what it would be like to lick the exposed skin, _not that I would ever.._. She repeats the action to the other leg.

She crawls towards him on the bed, the shift hanging low, exposing her cleavage. He licks his lips, wishing to taste any bit of her, but feeling as if he can't. She nestles next to him on her back, the shift still around the tops of her thighs. He touches the material. It is so soft against his fingertips. He takes a deep breath and wraps his hands around her thighs, his thumb making small circles on her skin.

She touches his face before her eyes flutter shut in sensation. He pushes the shift higher, exposing her drawers, then her navel. He sees her eyes shut and daringly goes down and licks her belly button. She gasps and her eyes open in wonder. He looks down at her, unsure, and once again she gives away nothing. He feels as if he has done something wrong again.

He gulps, and pushes her shift up, over her chest and head. She is half naked in front of him, and he holds the material in his hand, breathless again. She covers herself, her hands clenched in fists while her arms protect her under his gaze, her cheeks burning. He tosses the garment to the side and brings his arms around her, his lips connecting with hers.

"Please don't cover yourself Morgana…you are breathtaking."

Her soft hand comes up to run her fingers over his face.

"I'm nervous tonight, probably more so than you." He confesses.

"I doubt that." He smiles at the retort.

"I mean it," he hugs her closer, "I only just realized that this would happen when we were standing outside ready to get married. Never, in my wildest fantasies did I think you would ever say yes, and allow me to look upon your naked flesh. Your just…Morgana you are so stunning. It is as if I am gazing upon a goddess."

She thinks over his words for a moment.

"A goddess?"

"Aphrodite doesn't hold a crown to you…my love."

He whispers the last part. He is unsure how she will take it. She smiles. Her hands shake as she pushes at his drawers, his eyes widen and he quickly complies. He kicks at them and they get tangled over his feet, real smooth indeed. She laughs as he moves to remove them from around his ankles.

He turns around to give her some saucy retort about how hard that was, when he realizes she has removed hers without him seeing, and is staring strongly at the ceiling. She is lying there, naked. He closes his eyes and wills himself to calm down. He moves over to her, and she nestles him between her thighs.

"Are you ready Morgana?"

His hands smooth over her forehead. She nods, her eyes looking deep into his soul.

"I am Merlin."

He positions himself and pushes in, and she gasps and he groans. His hands have left her back and are steadying himself on the headrest. It is indescribable. The heat of her warmth feels like hot oil all around him. His teeth are grinding, she is so tight. He looks down and sees her face scrunched up, an uncomfortable look adorning her features.

"Morgana" he hisses out, he wants to move.

"Merlin, ah!"

He bucks into her without meaning too. He can't help himself once he starts…it only takes a few strokes and he spills, his eyes roll in the back of his head at the feeling. Being inside her was incredible…nothing in his life has ever prepared him for that pleasure…except…he looks down at her apologetically, sweat adorning his forehead. He knows she did not reach the same heights he had, and he feels…ashamed. He doesn't think she even started up the mountain. He gulps from above her, his knuckles white from gripping the head rest.

"Morgana-"

"It's ok Merlin…its ok."

She pulls from him and rolls over facing the wall, her body quivering. His fingers ghost over her back, he stops when he feels her shiver. He looks down, there is red on her thighs. He feels awful.

He moves quickly from the bed and runs into their bath chamber. Morgana looks up, surprised at his movement. She is now attempting to calm her breathing. The whole experience is so new, her body has never been invaded like that before, she feels so vulnerable.

"Merlin?" _What is he doing?_

He comes back a moment later with a bucket and wash cloth. He kneels at the side of the bed and motions for her to give him her legs. She trembles as her legs come over the side to rest in front of him. He cautiously takes the cloth and starts to wash her ankles, then moves up slowly to her knees. It is the tenderest gesture anyone has ever given her.

"Morgana…I'm sorry but can you…"

She opens her legs to him, the sheet being held around her lap and chest. He washes her thighs and then softly moves his hand under the sheet and takes the cloth to her nether lips. She hisses and he frowns at her response and the blood he finds.

"Did you take the tonic I have given you?" He asks from between her legs.

His gaze is focused, but she notices his body is rickety.

"Yes."

"Good."

He finishes a moment later. He walks away to puts the pan back in the bath chamber. She is looking at the linens longingly when he re-enters. He looks at her sad expression and makes his way over to his side of the mattress, pulling the comforter up and nestling himself into bed, he feels terrible for causing her pain. He faces away from her, not able to confront what he has done.

"Merlin?" Her voice is so timid.

"Yes Morgana?" He is glaring at the wall.

She touches his spine and he breaks slightly. She pushes him down onto his back and he looks at her. Her eyes are so soft, a small smile on her lips.

"Thank you for washing me." He gulps.

"Anytime Milady."

She lies down in the crevice of his arm and body. He runs a shaky hand down her back, and when she doesn't pull away, just throws an arm over his stomach and pulls him closer, he sighs in relief.

Maybe there is _hope_ yet.

**_Fin._**

**Ok so I'm really gonna be curious to everyone's reactions on this. It was really hard to write them being all nervous because lets be honest...have you met Merlin and Morgana?...but I really wanted to make their first experience together super believable, I think Merlin is a quick learner, but even he has his...slower days HAHA. But don't fret folks! Merlin will be very...studious in the next chapter ;).**

**As always happy reading! Can't wait to hear from ya'll:)**


	6. Round Two Of Humiliation

"So you hit your head on the head board…"

Merlin's face is in his hands, Arthur next to him, the King is attempting to not laugh at his friend's misfortune. Merlin groans, _this is awful._

"I don't want to talk about this anymore."

"Well I'd say you do considering Morgana had to send her wedding dress back to the dress maker _because you ripped it_!"

Arthur is holding his stomach from laughter. Merlin looks up at him from the side. He is so humiliated…it is bad enough Morgana was a part of that atrocity it is even worse Arthur has found out. Gwen has been the only kind one in this whole situation. She came to him after talking to Morgana and wrapped him in a big hug.

"You know, I know a certain Queen who said her first time was awful as well."

Arthur's laughter stops a moment. _Oh Merlin don't fret, poor Arthur had no idea what he was doing the first time he bedded me!_

"You're lying." Arthur's eyes narrow.

"Nope, Guinevere came to me and told me that you weren't as amazing as you think you were."

"Well obviously she was only saying that to make you feel better."

"Or she was saying it because it was the truth."

"You know what-"

"Arthur!" Guinevere is walking toward them with her maid Lilly.

Arthur gulps.

"Guinevere!"

"Arthur I told you not to tease him about this. He is very sensitive right now, so is Morgana."

"Yes Guinevere I know-"

"And you can't sit there making him feel awful when you were _not_ the prince charming I had imagined the first time we made love!"

Arthur's mouth falls open. Merlin is behind Gwen now, arms crossed, looking smug. Guinevere's eyes widen and her hand comes to her mouth, feeling awful at the insult.

"Not that you're not wonderful now…it's just you remember how horrifying…oh dear…"

They start to bicker and Merlin quickly makes an exit. _Married couples…who needs that?_

* * *

He has been reading vigorously for two weeks. He hasn't been able to bring himself to touch her after that horrific experience. He grabs his hair in frustration, these books…_ugh why don't they help more?_

That afternoon he walks into his shared bed chambers. She is not there and he is actually grateful, he sits at the table with his head in his hands, _oh what is he to do?_ He looks out the window, he can't even find it in himself to snuggle with her the way they did that first night. He just gets into the bed, faces the wall and glares at the offensive mass until he passes out. He knows he's hurt her with his behavior but he can't bring himself to be close to her…_If I get close to her then I'll want…_

Suddenly his door creeks and in she comes, _alone_…_in that sinful emerald dress…bloody hell…_

He suddenly can't look away from her. Ever since that first time, the experience of being nestled in her heat, he finds his primitive instincts push at him every time he sees her. He imagines her in so many different ways, _so many fantasies_, but he knows none of them will come to pass…for his fantasies always involve her enjoying herself as much as he does.

"Merlin?"

He's been staring at her. He shakes his head from his daydreams and slowly rises.

"Morgana, hello."

They stand there and he can't even bring himself to act normally around her, he takes a gulp.

"Is it always going to be like this now?"

He looks at her wearily. She is looking to the side, embarrassed with her question.

"What…uh…no…?"

"Merlin…"

"Morgana…"

They look at each other, he deflates.

"Morgana…I don't know what to say."

"I would like honesty. We have been married for two weeks and you won't even hold my hand let alone anything else. I want us to be honest with each other Merlin…the way I used to be cruelly honest with you back when I was consumed with hatred."

She looks down. Her poor cheeks are red again. The words hurt to say, but they need to be said. She never held back her distain for him in the past, so in the present she wishes to not hold back how much she cares for him, their desire for one another. She wants him to show her the same kindness. He nods knowingly. _She wants me to show her affection again…_

"Ok…Morgana…I feel awful."

She looks surprised at this, he takes a deep breath.

"After our wedding night…I haven't been able to bring myself to touch you. I want to, so badly, but all my fantasies involve you enjoying the experience as much as I do. I don't want you to feel the way you did that first night…I feel…I feel like I took advantage of you."

He looks down dejectedly. He doesn't see her eyes widen, and how she quickly crosses the room and throws her arms over his shoulders.

"Oh Merlin…don't feel that way please."

He looks down at her, his trembling hands resting on her hips. He revels in the renewed contact.

"How can I not, I hurt you." He frowns.

Her fingers come up to his cheeks, coaxing his face to down to look her in the eyes.

"It is part of the experience, my love." His breath hitches, the nickname welcomed.

She takes a deep breath.

"I was so scared that night, even when you got close to me I was shaking. I don't regret nor am I upset from our first time. You made me laugh and feel at ease, I just think we missed a few steps along the way, that's all. I couldn't even bring myself to tell you that I liked it when you touched me."

She blushes. He stares.

"You like it when I touch you?"

He is cautious, his hands moving from her hips to her back, and sliding up her spine. Her eyes close and she bites her lip, driving him mad.

"Yes, I love it when you touch me."

He becomes bold at her words and swoops down to kiss her hungrily on the lips, something he has desired to do since those first years in Camelot. She returns the gesture, her tongue invading his mouth. It only lasts a moment but it is enough to stir the great warlock on, she is kissing him back. He pulls back, her lips swollen from his kiss, he likes her like this.

"I love you Morgana."

Her eyes open and her lip trembles.

"I love you too Merlin."

Her voice is so quiet, he closes his eyes, realizing that it is the first time she has said those words. Even their wedding wasn't as cherished as this moment. She does love him, she has even confessed. His eyes open and he nods at her and she looks confused, he grabs her hand and leads her to their bed.

Her eyes widen in shock, he wants to do that _now?_ In the middle of the afternoon?

He turns back for a brief moment. His eyes are different this time, he seems more determined than he was that first night.

"Merlin you don't mean too-"

"Morgana, I want to show you how much I desire you…"

Her eyes widen. She takes a breath. He walks backwards slowly leading her to the bed. Her hand comes up to his heart. She can feel it thumping rapidly beneath her fingertips. Her earlier reservations abandoned.

"I want to show you how much I want you as well Merlin." His eyes darken.

When they reach the side of the bed he brings her close and kisses her hungrily again, she can't resist running her fingers through his hair, his passion filtering into her pores, his confidence awakening something inside of her. With his lips on hers he takes a mental note that this makes her happy, she is arching into him, the books say this is good. _Her pleasure, her pleasure, _it is his new mantra. He goes to start unbuttoning his jacket but she has beat him too it.

Morgana's heart tells her to take action, to show him that she wants this as much as he does. With her lips still on his, she brings her hands to the material and slowly unbuttons his jacket all the way down.

His breath hitches, it is so intimate when _she_ does it. She stops kissing him and pushes it down his shoulders, landing on the floor. He sits her down on the bed and makes quick work of his boots and socks. He then kneels in front of her, his hands coming down to take her shoes off, she subconsciously licks her lips at the gesture, he looks up and she grabs his face and brings it to her, she does like to kiss him.

He stands her up again, and gently starts on her bow and laces. He realizes he can't undo the laces without looking so he breaks from her lips and turns her around. He is desperate to keep this mood going, to keep their intimacy.

_I'm just going to undo your laces and take out the pins in your hair._

She is quiet for a moment. He doesn't see her eyes bulge as she holds onto the bed post. Before only venom was used in this channel, now it is soft words and sweet feelings. He's never used this avenue to talk to her in such an intimate way.

_I like when you talk to me like this._

He looks at her, surprised.

_You do?_

_Yes._

He makes a note to use that channel with her more often. His hand first goes to her hair, taking out all the pins and allows it to flow freely down her back, she hums in appreciation. His left hand comes around her stomach while his right continues on her laces. He remembers the books talking of how sensitive the neck and ears on are a woman. He cautiously brings his lips to her neck tenderly and she gasps, he hesitates until she moans his name.

"Merlin…"

He finds himself stirred by her moans and starts to suck on her exquisite neck and moves up to her ear, his hand finally finishing with the laces. He nibbles on her ear lovingly and then moves down to suck where her neck and shoulder meet, hoping she is enjoying the action as much as he is.

"Oh Merlin!" She gasps he does a silent victory in his head.

She turns, and they make eye contact. She closes her eyes, and Merlin wonders if he has over stepped some boundaries until she starts to take her dress _and_ shift off at once. His eyes bulge, she is willingly undressing in front of him. He must remember that neck thing in the future. He pulls off his tunic, both garments forgotten on the floor. He grabs around her naked back and brings her mouth to his. He can feel her shaking again.

"You are so exquisite Morgana, never feel uncomfortable under my gaze." he whispers into her lips.

Her sharp jade eyes look up at him.

"Does it please you that much to gaze upon me?" She is shy again for a moment.

He gulps, his eyes darken.

"It riles me in ways I cannot explain to you my love."

He lifts her slightly and sits her on the bed. He kneels in front of her again and slowly takes the first stocking off. He looks up at her. She touches his face and smiles. She knows she must try to get over her fear. She is received with a roguish smile from him and watches as he gives into his urge to kiss and lick her exposed skin as he pulls it down her leg, she closes her eyes in sensation. He repeats the gesture on the other leg. Her hand comes down to run through his hair, encouraging him.

He stands before her, and he suddenly feels her hands on him. Morgana's mind is that of understanding, last time he did not know what she wanted, so she must show him this time. She starts pulling at the buttons on his trousers and pushing them and his drawers down. His eyes widen at her bold action, her hands are on his naked hips. It is just her sitting there, her breath so close to his member, he never realized the image could stir such things inside of him.

She looks at his shaft as he gazes upon her. She wonders…she thinks…He watches her lean forward and brushes her soft tongue against his tip. She looks up to him and gasps at the shock on his face. She quickly pulls back.

"I'm sorry…I just…" He kneels down, leveling with her.

He takes her hands in his. He is shaking from suppressed arousal.

"Dear lord Morgana do not apologize for that…I just…I don't think I will last with your tempting mouth so near to me."

She blushes, he smiles. He kisses her softly again, and is rewarded with her tongue invading his mouth, he groans.

He softly pushes her back against the pillows and slowly pulls down her drawers. He is willing the knowledge from the books back. She has already done something so erotic to him tonight. He pushes it from his mind, _her pleasure, her pleasure. _He lies to the side of her, his fingers tracing her stomach, the rays of sun illuminating her perfect skin. She is shuddering again, and he knows to be soft this time.

His hand moves up to take one of her breasts in his hand, she gasps and groans as his head comes back to her neck. He licks down, and takes one of the tight pearls into his mouth, she whimpers, he almost moves to ask what's wrong, but her hand has come back to his hair, urging him on. He sucks on one, nipping at the tight bud, and then moves over to give it the same pleasure. He still feels unsure in his actions. His head lifts up slightly to peer over at his wife.

"Morgana is this…"

She blushes, but wills herself to be honest.

"Merlin, please don't stop." She says hurriedly.

She feels like a mess now, she has never felt anything like this before. His hand runs over her navel, her words encouraging him, then down to her most precious spot. He remembers the books talking of a 'magic button' on a woman's body. He cautiously goes to her folds and attempts to find the 'button.'

She moans when he finally touches her, his fingers roaming her neither lips. She suddenly bucks into his hand, and he knows he has found it. He smiles over her chest, his mouth still ravishing her. He slowly plays with the spot and she whimpers, but cries out in pleasure when he inserts a finger into her waiting body. He halts his menstruations, his eyes wide, she feels shy again.

"You are so wet, my love."

His face is hovering over her, she bites her lip, his pupils dilate at the image and he swoops in to nibble on her pouty bottom lip for her. She moans into his mouth, her hands coming up to run though his hair, he smiles again. The desire in her eyes is evident as she slowly opens them when he is done ravishing her mouth.

"Is that bad, ah!" He thrusts another finger inside of her, his beautiful sapphire eyes darken.

"No…it's amazing. You're aroused." He smiles wickedly at her, and she gasps in return.

He removes his hand, she whimpers in protest. He moves down her body and coaxes her thighs open.

"Ah Merlin!" She attempts to cover herself in front of him.

He smiles, and grabs her hand urging her to sit up. He kisses her knuckles then lazily licks over her palm and down to her wrist, where he gives into the temptation to suck, she moans, when did she become so vulnerable to him?

"I want to see you _my wife_."

"You see me every day." She counters, he smiles. He feels the atmosphere shift, he likes this.

"I want to see," he pushes his fingers into her again, she gasps, "_you._"

She suddenly cannot resist nodding, she is curious as to what he will do next, and watches and he opens her thighs. He pushes her onto her back and looks at her body. He has never seen a woman's nether regions up close…its magnificent. Her fluids glisten on her tight curls, her nub engorged from being played with, the scent of her, driving him mad. He has done it. He has made her aroused, he smiles to himself.

He gives into the enticement and kisses her.

"Ah Merlin!"

Once he tastes her he cannot stop himself. He licks at her again and again. She quakes on top of him.

"Oh my God…"

She is moaning into the pillows, she is so divine. He can't get enough of her, his tongue thrusting into her to get more of her sweet taste. His fingers coming up to play with that magical spot, she is bucking into him now, the pleasure consuming her. _So this is truly what it is like to be with a man…_

"Oh my, Merlin!"

She feels it. This overpowering force takes over her body. The white heat consumes her soul and her _husband_ does not let up until she rides out her high. He crawls back up and over her body, looking down at her. She sees her essence on his lips, and takes all her courage to lift herself up and lick at his lips, she does taste erotic. He groans at the gesture, he seems to like it when she is bold.

He bites his lip. She sees why it drives him crazy when she does it. He's begging to ask.

"Did you…?"

"Yes."

He sighs in relief, he is so happy. She cups his face to look at her.

"Is that what it felt like…when you spilled inside of me?"

He gulps.

"Even more powerful my wife…being inside of you…is like the greatest torture of my life."

She nods and grabs him, the shaft feeling hard in her hands and she does not know why the feeling of it makes _her_ beautiful emerald eyes darken, his breath hitches.

_His shaft_, the thing that had made her so vulnerable, so scared, is now the instrument of her desire. Before she saw his member as a piece of invasion, now she sees it as a connect between them, it is his key to her lock.

"Let's experience torture together."

Her voice is husky, he nods. He braces himself on his hands. Her delicate arms come up and around his shoulders. He pushes in softly this time and watches as her head flies back, her nails digging into his back, his jaw clenches. She is mystifying with her hair thrown about on the pillows. He calms himself. He knows she must experience ecstasy first.

They make eye contact and he pulls out slowly and pushes back in, she groans. He repeats his soft menstruations, and for a while they lazily make love, his hands around her back, his lips connect with hers softly. He does not want to overwhelm either of them like last time.

It isn't until he feels her buck under him that he breaks the kiss and growls, he sees her shiver from his response. He must ask before he goes any further, hoping her shiver is good not bad.

_What is it __**my**__ lady requires?_

He is moving a little harder, she looks at him, those beautiful lips open slightly.

_I wish for you to go faster…harder…_

He bears his teeth to her and pushes in and she whimpers but pushes back with equal force, she is moving, she is enjoying herself. The thought stirs him on, and he finds himself moving into her as quickly and as hard as he can.

"Ah Merlin!"

"Morgana!"

He roars her name as he fills her, she is panting below him, beads of sweat adorning her skin, his fingers running through her hair, damp from sweat. He looks down at her, hoping above hope that he has done better. Those jade eyes are soft and he gulps.

"I now understand why you wanted to do that so badly." She teases.

His head falls to her shoulder, that is probably the closest thing to praise he will ever get, he should take it.

"You were amazing Merlin."

He pulls back to look at her, she is smiling, her fingers running over his delectable ears.

"Ah…oh wow…um thank you."

He blushes as her hands run over his stomach, she bites her lip again taunting him, her hips move, he may have softened but he is still nestled inside of her and he groans.

"Morgana…"

"Ready for round three, _Emrys_?"

His eyes fly open. He sends her a roguish smile.

"Always _**My**__ Lady_."

**_Fin._**

**So yea that was kind of a doozy to read...oh well! This was actually one of the harder chapters to write because I really wanted to show the parallels between their first time and their second, mainly how Merlin and Morgana communicated more. Yes they talked about their fears their first time, but they didn't talk about what they enjoyed, so voila! I HAVE DONE IT!...also I got a lil inspiration last night and this will be 10 chapters instead of 9!...I like the number 10 better anyway...if you couldn't tell from my pirates stories:) **

**Anywho, you know what that review button is for! Thanks again for reading! :)**


	7. Distrust Is Scale Deep

It has been three months of marital bliss. Merlin smiles to himself as he looks out the window in nothing but his birthday suit, his wife sleeping peacefully during this lazy afternoon. He canceled all his meetings today and forced Morgana to do the same. She protested at first saying she had rituals, but one mischievous look from Merlin was all it took for her to abandon everything.

She shifts on the bed and sits up, the sheet falling from her chest, her nakedness being something she cared little about these days, even with Bruce in the room. It's as if the magical couple has become so at ease with each other and their servants that their nudity is something that seems to bother none of them.

He turns to watch her yawn, her hands coming up to brush through her beautiful hair. Her lips are swollen from his kisses and she has markings all over her body, she does look thoroughly ravished, he smiles. She should always look like this. She looks around before she catches his eyes, a wicked smirk adorning her face.

"Merlin what are you doing? Come to bed."

He looks back to her and saunters his way over, dancing to their bed, she laughs. He tackles her into the linens and kisses her face playfully, she is giggling the whole time.

"Have you not had enough of me yet my love?" He asks her huskily.

"I could never have enough of you _Emrys_…"

He smiles roguishly at her but knows he's been going at her for eight hours now. She probably needs her rest as much as he does.

"Well, as wonderful as that is I'm sure you are hungry."

She opens her mouth to protest but her stomach speaks up for her, they both laugh.

"Would my wife like a picnic?"

Her eyes glow gold and her hands come together in delight.

"Yes please!"

He moves to get out of the bed when a letter with Camelot's emblem catches his eye and reminds him of the final barrier in their relationship, something they have not talked about yet. He is silent as he gazes at the parchment, a feeling of dread suddenly coming over him.

"Morgana…I want to get out of Camelot for our picnic." His back is to her.

"Yes that's fine, I'll have Angela and Bruce prepare our horses."

She is moving to get out of bed herself when she feels his concern. He's worried about something. She changes direction and moves over to him, her legs coming on either side of his body so she can sit on her knees, her delectable chest pressed into his back, her arms coming around his shoulders, her cheek next to his.

"What is wrong my love?"

He holds her arms, his face coming to the side to snuggle into her hair.

"I need to show you something."

"What is it you need to show me Merlin?"

"I need to show you my dragons."

"Your what?"

* * *

He hadn't mentioned Kilgarrah or Aithusa to Morgana yet. When he brought up the destiny bit he left them out, he was not ready to topple that subject yet. They were his ace in the whole if the situation with her, pre and post marriage went south.

In the last few months, though, she has given and showed him so much. She has changed, Merlin was certain of that. Kilgarrah, though, was very displeased when he heard of Merlin and Morgana's marriage. The Great Dragon had left long before their union and was staying on the outskirts of town, a place he started to occupy when she had returned and said he would only return under dire circumstances.

* * *

"_I do not like this young warlock."_

"_Please, Kilgarrah, hear me out. She has changed."_

"_She is and always will be __**a witch**__."_

"_DO NOT CALL HER THAT!" He was in rage. "She is to be my wife, you will show her respect."_

"_I hope for your sake, high sorcerer, that she deserves it. The only future I have seen is one where she is beyond evil and leads to Albion's destruction and Arthur's death, I have never seen her redeem herself."_

"_She is good, she is different."_

"_She is wicked Merlin, have you become so blind to the whims of a beautiful woman?"_

"_She is more than that, she is kind and passionate. She is the Morgana I remember, she had a vision…"_

"_Or she is still a liar!"_

"_SHE IS NOT!"_

_There is silence between the two, a face off of power between dragon and the dragonlord. Merlin breaks it after a breath._

"Maybe she is stronger than you, for she has seen it. Her vision will come to pass. I believe her."

"_For your destiny, I hope you are right."_

_Kilgarrah did not trust this, but he did not wish to be on the dark side of his dragonlord. When he finally faced __**the witch**__ he would put an end to this, he would show Merlin the truth. For now, he will go silent, by the orders of Emrys._

_Merlin knew the subject was not dropped, but did not feel the need to bicker with the Great Dragon any longer. He is tired of fighting with Kilgarrah about this. Kilgarrah was easy enough when Morgana returned and Merlin sent them away, at the time the high sorcerer was on his side…this marriage though…he did not like it. Merlin was changing just as much as Morgana and the Great Dragon feared she will convince him to do wicked deeds now that she has him nestled between her thighs. The Great Dragon shakes his head and looks over at Aithusa._

"_We must go now. You will be expected back soon." Kilgarrah states._

_Aithusa stays quite through the whole exchange, he still does not wish anyone to know the role he played in Morgana's life. He fears the repercussions._

"_We will talk of this later Kilgarrah."_

_Merlin nods at both his dragons as they lift off and fly away, an itching fear creeping up his spine._

* * *

They are in the field when he calls for both of his dragons. Morgana is in her maroon gown, basket one hand, holding Merlin's in the other. She feels her eyes go gold and her magic reacts to the words that fall from Merlin's lips. She feels it pulse beneath her skin. Her eyes linger on him. His dragonlord powers are quite…arousing. Her mood shifts and she clings to him when she sees both animals approaching. Merlin looks at her in amusement.

They land side by side. Merlin takes a deep breath ready to explain when he sees his wife drop the basket and run towards Aithusa.

"It's you!"

She crosses the field and throws herself on the dragon's nose and Aithusa returns the gesture. It has been almost two and a half years since she's seen the small dragon. He has grown, and reaches up to the top of Kilgarrah's back now, not fully developed but close. He snuggles into her, Merlin and Kilgarrah look on in shock.

"You know him Morgana?" Merlin speaks cautiously.

His wife is busying herself with rubbing Aithusa's nose, the young dragon squawking in approval.

"He saved my life."

"He what?" Kilgarrah roared.

Aithusa puts his head down in shame, Morgana looks on, puzzled.

"Aithusa…that was against orders from the dragonlord."

"I know Kilgarrah…I just couldn't let her die. I felt goodness within her."

The young dragon looks down in shame.

"Who is the dragonlord?" Morgana asks but an instant later widens her eyes in revelation.

She looks to Merlin who looks ashamed. He gulps. He does not know how this meeting will end.

"Morgana…"

There is silence for a moment, and both parties do nothing. He has no words, no explanation. At the time he is was right in his decision to let her die. She had committed great crimes against Camelot…but seeing her now, here, as his wife? His heart feels awful. He opens and closes his mouth a few times, willing himself to explain, but no words pass. Luckily, his wife takes pity on him.

"It's ok Merlin." She walks over to him slowly, both dragons watching her with intensity.

"I understand," He looks at her longingly surprised by her forgiveness, "if I was in your position, I would not have wanted to save me either."

"Morgana it wasn't-" She grabs his ears.

"My love it is ok. I am not upset. I should be, but considering how many times we tried to hurt each other back then I cannot blame you, I would have made the same decision. Camelot has shown me its forgiveness in light of what I've done. I should show you the same. Luckily," she turns and walks toward the white dragon, "one of your dragons is smarter than you and saved my life."

She puts her hand on Aithusa's neck and smiles back at Merlin, he lets out a breath he did not realize he was holding. Somehow, she has surprised him again with her level of compassion. Kilgarrah watches her closely. She does not turn to him when she addresses him.

"You do not trust me Great Dragon."

"I do not."

"You do not believe I have seen what I have seen. That I have _changed_."

"I do not." He growls at her.

She walks up to him and raises a hand, he hisses.

"Please, from one seer to another, let me show you."

Merlin's heart clenches as she places her hand softly on Kilgarrah's head, her eyes going gold, her palm shimmers as she passes the vision to the great dragon. Kilgarrah hums, the feeling of magic always seems to put him at ease. Aithusa watches with great interest as does the dragonlord, when the vision has passed, Kilgarrah looks at Morgana and she smiles.

Then something extraordinary happens, the great dragon leans forward and nuzzles Merlin's wife. She returns the gesture, throwing herself on his nose, a few stray tears falling from her eyes.

"That is a beautiful vision my lady. Your powers seem to have exceeded my expectations."

"Merlin has been helping me."

"I see the young warlock has. I would love to work with you more on your seer abilities."

"Thank you, I would love that as well."

Merlin felt like crying, this vision…this one hope has saved Morgana and brought peace to Albion and now has brought together Morgana and the Great Dragon. He takes a shaky breath, picks up the basket, and adjusts the blankets in his arms.

"Shall we all go on a picnic then?"

Kilgarrah lowers his head, and Merlin moves to help Morgana up. Her eyes are soft as she climbs up and holds onto the dragon's horn. She then takes the basket while Merlin helps himself up. His arms fixated securely around her and she smiles.

"Let's go Kilgarrah. I need to impress my wife."

With a roar, the dragon takes off.

_**Fin.**_

**So I got the dragons in there...finally haha. I'm sure people were wondering why the hell I haven't mentioned them yet...so I did. Any who, I'm not sure if this was too rushed or not, but the whole reason he believes her so quickly will be explained in the next few chapters so ya there's that:)**

**As always, thanks for reading guys! Hope to hear from you!**


	8. Lost Loves And Sweet Kisses

They are lying lazily on a blanket, Kilgarrah snoring next to them, Aithusa flying over head, doing tricks. He is still young, he is still wild. He enjoys the new spot they have found near the water, lots of grass, and a few trees. Enough space for both his dragons to settle. Morgana is looking out to the lake they have come too, a distant look in her eyes.

"I like this lake." She says.

He eyes her for a second.

"That's good."

"You know a woman lives in this lake."

Merlin chokes on the wine he was drinking and she laughs.

"I'm sorry what?"

"I can feel her, she lives in the lake. She is very lonely."

Merlin looks at her startled and then his gaze falls longingly on the lake.

"Is she sad?"

"She seems to wish someone was there with her, but I don't know who."

Morgana feel sad at the poor girl's loneliness. She looks at Merlin and is stunned to see the tears run down his cheeks. She moves to him quickly, wiping the tears away. Kilgarrah stirs next to them. He looks at his dragonlord, his head coming up at the warlock's sadness. Morgana and the dragon make eye contact. She sends him a worried look. Kilgarrah sends her a board gaze in return and goes back to napping.

"My love what is wrong."

"I'm sorry Morgana. I shouldn't be getting worked up like this."

"Do you know her?"

He lays his head on her shoulder and attempts to will the tears away.

"I did, a long time ago."

Morgana closes her eyes at the contact.

"You mean you loved her a long time ago."

He picks his head up and stares at her. She is not judging or mad, just honest. Aithusa lands next to them and looks at his mentor.

_Her empathy is strong Kilgarrah._

_Yes, she will make a powerful priestess I believe._

_Does Merlin know the name of the babe yet?_

_He will soon enough._

"Morgana…"

"Merlin it is ok, you're allowed to love others in your past. I do not judge you for it."

He shakes his head, the confession begging to fall from his lips. He takes a deep breath, all his courage coming to the surface.

"Her name was Freya, a young druid girl. I saved her from being killed, she was so beautiful. I was so young and naive not really thinking through anything. I wanted to give up everything for her, my destiny, Camelot, everything. For days I was with her I felt like I was walking in the clouds. I protected her, she knew of my magic. We got very close."

Morgana's eyes are soft. She urges him to continue…even if the story was hard to hear.

"She used to turn into a horrible creature at night though. It was her curse. Arthur ended up killing her…and I ended up cremating her here…on this lake."

Morgana holds his hand. She is so sweet sometimes he finds it hard to believe the witch she used to be.

"I'm sure Arthur did not mean to kill your love." Merlin sighs.

"He didn't, he was protecting Camelot. He knows, and I've forgiven him. He's forgiven me in return, I'm just sad to know she's lonely."

Morgana rests her head on his shoulder, her hand coming over to lace with his.

"Do you wish to be with her?"

Her voice is small, she should not ask, she has no right, but she wants to know what is in her husband's heart. She is an empath, but she will never invade ones thoughts, she has become more courteous than that.

"I did for a long time…" his cheek softly settles on her hair.

"I thought about her sometimes when I was alone and hiding my magic. Then you would consume my thoughts, even then you were all I could think about."

She smiles at him but it does not reach her eyes.

"It's ok to say you would still want to be with her."

"I would if it was the truth."

She looks at him, her eyes show the small amount of fear she feels. He kisses her knuckles.

"Never be jealous of a ghost my wife, or of a situation that we do not know or will we ever know the result of. Know, that I am with you now and forever, I love you Morgana. I am just sad for I wish Freya was not lonely. I wish she could have found the happiness I have found with you."

Morgana smiles up at him, and he brings his lips to hers and pushes her back onto the blanket, kissing her lazily.

"Will you say it again?" Morgana runs her hands through his hair.

"I love you Morgana."

"Of course you do."

He laughs and captures her lips in a soft kiss, his wife moans in response. He feels the wind move and they both look up as Kilgarrah flies off and Aithusa follows his example. Merlin sends Morgana a sweet smile and slowly starts on her laces. They quietly take off their clothes, not many words pass between them, just small kisses and deep looks.

She is bare in front of him as she climbs on his lap. He runs his hands over her back, soothing her of this dreadful feeling he has brought out. He knows she understands, but he never wants her feel as if he wishes to be anywhere but with her.

He drapes the blanked over their waits as she slides onto him. She is always so perfectly tight for him. He looks up in awe at her and his fingers run over her spine as she moves softly on him. He wants her to set the pace, be in control, for he knows this discussion has left her feeling very much out of control.

She kisses his neck her lips moving lazily up to his ear. She bites the lobe and his grip on her waist tightens. His breath hitches as she sucks at his skin, now _she_ suddenly feels possessive.

She moves back to look her in the eye as she moves. He brushes a few strands of hair away from her face.

"I love you Morgana."

She slows for a moment, connecting their foreheads.

"I love you as well Merlin."

She moves away, her sensual hips moving a little faster. He holds her back and slowly lowers her to lie down, he moves inside her, he wishes to help her release her tension, he always knows exactly what to do with her body now. Her legs are high on his hips as she climaxes, her eyes lock with his as he spills. It is not as powerful as other times they make love, but it is just as soul wrenching as always.

He dips his head down, and kisses her softly.

* * *

Kilgarrah and Aithusa have deemed it safe to return to the picnic sight an hour or so later. The Great Dragon resumes his nap and the white dragon follows his example. Kilgarrah sneaks a peak at the couple, sitting on the blanket, a sheet thrown over their naked bodies, their picnic forgotten.

She is between his legs, his arms around her. He kisses her temple and she hums in approval.

"If it sets your mind at ease Morgana, I never wanted to ravish Freya the way I wish to do to you…every moment of every day…"

Morgana clicks her tongue.

"That is a settling thought thank you, _Milord_."

He rubs the cloth over her belly, both looking out into the beautiful water. He should feel worse about making love to his wife in front of the lake he knows his dead girlfriend occupies…but for some reason he only feels peace.

Morgana gets up bringing the sheet with her, wrapping it around her like a toga. Merlin reaches for the second sheet, his back up. She is always walking off with his linens so he always brings extras.

He watches her go over to Kilgarrah and pets him affectionately. The Great Dragon purrs in approval, moving his nose slightly but settling back and letting her hands move over his rough scales. She turns to Merlin. He is smiling at the scene, his wife in nothing but a sheet, hair tossed from his fingers, petting his great friend.

She walks back over to him on her tip toes and falls into his lap, her legs thrown over one leg, the other she uses as a back rest. He pulls at the sheet settling her naked flesh against his own, his arms coming around her, the sheet hiding their modesty. She stares on in wonder at the two dragons.

"Merlin, I never asked you. How did you become a dragonlord?"

He looks up at both of his friends a sad smile on his lips.

"You remember how I told you Arthur has committed transgressions against me?"

She remembers and nods.

"One of them was against my father. He didn't kill him, but was with me when he died. He told me to suck it up and not be upset over strangers. He did not know who the man was."

"He didn't know he was your father."

"No, my father did not even know he was my father until my last day with him," a tear slips out of the corner of his eye. Morgana wipes it away with her finger.

"You don't have to tell me."

"No I want to," he takes a breath, "he died in my arms. We were seeking him out for the sole reason to get Kilgarrah under control. You heard he attacked Camelot?"

"Yes."

"I was the one to set him free. As you know, he is the one who told me to distrust you."

Morgana's eyes sparkle and she sneaks a peak at the dragon.

"I don't think he feels that way now."

Merlin smiles.

"I don't think so either. Anyway, I set him free for helping me, and we had to get the last dragonlord to stop him. Gaius told me that the man was my father before I left."

Morgana ran her hand over his ear and into his hair.

"That is where you think your magic comes from."

"Yes."

"And, the powers of the dragonlord are passed down from father to son."

"Yes." He grins at her, what a clever woman he has married.

"Balinor the last dragonlord was my father, and he died in my arms."

Morgana tenses suddenly. Merlin's looks at her oddly.

"What did you call him?"

"Balinor?"

Morgana bites her lip and closes her eyes.

"Oh Merlin…"

**_Fin._**

**Yay! So were almost done! It's funny, I almost didn't put the love making scene in here, but I think it served its purpose once I wrote it:D Also, I have nothing against Freya, I just think Merlin understands that he is with Morgana and he should be with her no matter what that's all. Especially when she's nervous about their relationship. I like making her a little vulnerable, I think she strong and passionate but everyone has fears:)**

**Any who you know what that review button is for! As always thanks for reading!**


	9. Hands To Yourself Please

He is puzzled, she has become shy. Her cheeks are stained that delicious red, and he can't help but love when she gets this way.

"What is it my love?"

She closes her eyes.

"You have been so honest with me today. I think I should return the favor."

She moves slowly, and kisses him softly. She does not wish to break the soft intimacy they have achieved today. He does not have the same mind set and in return pushes back hungrily, their soft love making from before has not satisfied the great warlock. She allows this for a moment, when her husband gets passionate for her she cannot resist him. His hands come up and over her back, messaging her spine and shoulders, his lips break from hers for a moment and move down her jaw. She moans at the sensations he always pulls from her and holds onto his hair, encouraging him when she knows she must tell him this important detail. She just can never find it in herself to resist him anymore.

He moves up to her sensitive ear, he can never get enough of his new wife. She is so beautiful and sensual, her body is flawless. He sometimes wonders if that is why he always finds himself sucking on ever part of her, to brand her so she will always know he was there giving her pleasure, to rough her up as she has done to him countless times in the past. He moves down and starts on a particular part of her neck, she gasps as he sucks harder, and he suddenly wants her littered with evidence of _his_ kisses.

She moans his name and he lazily brings his lips up to her ear sucking on the lob, his wife's hands moving over his back and into his hair, his fingers are ghosting over her calves and moving north. His lips connect with hers again, his tongue invading her mouth, hungry for her. She knows if she does not stop this they will end up having another row right here in front of the lake…again.

She pulls away quickly and laughs at his puckered lips. He takes the hint, a goofy grin on his face. He holds her close and wills his body to relax. She wishes to talk. He must give her that curtsy. He brings his lips to kiss behind her ear one last time before he speaks.

"What is it you wish to tell me Morgana?" he whispers into her sensitive lobe, she shivers from sensation.

He moves his face and his nose bumps her affectionately. She giggles in delight.

"I wasn't completely honest when I told you of my vision."

He cocks an eyebrow towards her.

"Really? What did you leave out?"

"I know the name of the babe in my arms."

His eyes widen, his grip on her naked hips tightens.

"You do? Why did you not say anything?"

She bites her lip.

"I did not know what to make of the name. I didn't know what it meant. It was such an unusual thing to name a baby. I was never able to find any parchment or record of the babe's name."

He looks at her for a moment. He feels excited to find out the name of his and Morgana's baby.

"What is our baby's name?"

Her breath catches in her throat, her lips tremble.

"Our baby?"

He smiles as their eyes connect.

"Well yes Morgana _our_ baby. You are married to me, and therefore will be having a child with me at some point in the future."

She smiles and it is the most beautiful smile to ever come over her face.

"We're going to have a baby together." She states simply.

He grins at her, and it suddenly feels real. Their relationship, their love, they will one day produce a babe that will be the physical representation of their union, the thing she has desired above all else. He suddenly feels the urge to make babies with her now…

"Merlin!"

He is kissing her neck and rubbing her hip in that all too familiar matter, so she pushes at him playfully.

"I'm sorry Morgana you just had to start talking about _our_ baby…and honestly I think we need more practice in the…development of said baby."

She smacks him on the chest softly and he laughs, bringing her close and kissing her crown. She nestles close to him.

"The baby I saw, I know it's our baby."

"When you said yes to marry me I knew it was going to be my baby."

She rolls her eyes and he smiles.

"You seem surer right now."

"Yes, because you said his name."

Merlin's brow creases. Tears are in Morgana's eyes as she hugs her stomach.

"His name?"

"Yes Merlin, his name."

She smiles softly at him.

"You're going to have a boy…?"

Morgana nods, and once again the Merlin cannot help himself. He swoops in and kisses her desperately. The thought of his wife producing a male heir for him on the first try is overwhelming. He imagines her belly swelled with his child, a testament that she was his and so was the babe inside of her tummy. He cannot help himself from desiring to consume all of her, his hands run over her thighs and up to her hips, grabbing around her waist. She breaks off the kiss in an attempt to talk again, but he just attacks her neck, moving lower towards her chest.

"Merlin!" she grabs his hair and moves it so they are eye to eye, she has the most amused expression on her face.

"I'm sorry Morgana…but you're going to have a boy…I feel the need to celebrate…"

"My love you celebrate with me every night, morning, and moment we can spare. You went at me for _eight hours this morning_. Right now I am trying to tell you something important. I'm not even pregnant yet!" She laughs.

She moves to get off of his lap but he just grabs her around the waist to keep her there.

"Where do you think you're going?" He growls at her and she cocks an eye brow at him.

He is suddenly possessive of her…she finds herself liking it a little too much.

"Well I need to tell you our boy's name and you apparently can't help yourself with me on your lap."

"Yes I can."

"Really?" She looks at him skeptically.

"Yes of course Morgana, I am _Emrys_ the greatest sorcerer to ever live…I think I can handle myself around the whims of an…extraordinarily stunning…sensual…captivating…woman…"

He kisses her shoulder between each word and she relents, her fingers coming up to play with the hair on his chest, her head sitting on his shoulder, content with his compliments. She takes a deep breath.

"Merlin…"

He makes eye contact with her and raises his eyebrows in response, that goofy grin adorning his face.

"I called the baby Balinor."

Merlin stares at her for a moment, disbelieving. He gulps.

"You did?" His eyes widen.

"She did High Sorcerer." Kilgarrah provides.

Merlin looks over at The Great Dragon, one eye open, but shuts it when he has their attention. Morgana looks on curiously at the dragon's interruption.

"You saw it in the vision. That is why it made you so happy? That's why you trust her now?"

Kilgarrah looks at them as if bored.

"Yes, when I heard her say the babe's name in the prophecy I knew her dream was real. To unknowingly know the name of your father, it meant that she was meant to marry you and you alone if she wished to go down this new path. The woman in that vision was filled with love and devotion, and not just for the babe, for Camelot as well. Her adoration for the babe is filtered through her loyalty to Camelot. That is why I trust her."

Merlin looks towards Morgana, a stunned smile on her face. She did not realize the true meaning behind his trust. A wave of complete bliss overtakes her soul. She bites her lip and he moves to kiss her soundly.

"It's true then…we're going to have a baby boy named Balinor?"

"I believe so my love." She replies kissing his cheek.

He can't stop smiling, it is real, it is all real. He hugs her closer.

"Thank you."

"For what?"

"For allowing me to name our first child, for giving me a boy."

Morgana heart flutters at the compliment.

"I have a feeling you will be naming all of our children…you are kind of a girl."

"Oi! I am not a girl. Do I have to prove it to you again?"

He tickles her and she laughs on his lap, wiggling over him, his heart beats faster for a moment.

"You said children."

She regains her composure.

"Well I assume you would like more than one."

Merlin smiles, his thumb moving lightly over her knee.

"I do."

"I do as well."

There is not a greater moment in the young warlock's life than this. They will have _children_ together.

"There is one thing I defiantly want though, if we are to have children."

Her eyes are soft as she gazes at him, her hand softly scratching his scalp.

"Alright what is it?"

"I want a girl Morgana. I was a baby girl with your eyes and your passion. That is the only thing I want."

The High Priestess raises her delicate eye brow at him.

"I can't promise you her looks or personality but I can promise you a girl."

"Even if you have to have ten children?"

He looks at her suspiciously. She brings his lips to hers.

"Even if I have to have one hundred babes, I promise you a girl."

He holds her close and kisses her, their future looks _bright_.

_**Fin.**_

**Oh Merlin you really need to learn to keep your hands to yourself...not that I think Morgana minds:-P Well, there you are folks! Finally they talk about Balinor...man did it take a while to get here! I only have one more chapter for this and it will be done! Yay!...but don't fret! If you were savvy enough, god I love you Jack Sparrow, I already started my next piece:)**

**As always, I love hearing from you guys! Thanks again for reading!**


	10. Full Circle

He is pacing again.

_Why is it when something important is happening __**My**__ High Sorcerer is always pacing?_

Arthur thinks as he is leaning on his elbow watching Merlin make laps around him. They are alone in the warlock's shared chambers and once again Merlin will not stop moving.

"You can stop doing that at any time you know."

Arthur's bored expression comes out thickly, Merlin stops for a second and glares at his king.

"Do you always have to act that way?"

Arthur's brow furrows, he leans back and crosses his arms.

"What way?"

Merlin leans on the opposite side of the table toward him.

"That way that makes everyone in the room believes you know everything and are bored because you 'supposedly' have gone through it."

"That's because I have Mer_lin_."

Merlin pushes back and stands up.

"No, if I remember correctly you decided to go hunting that day."

Arthur furrows his brow.

"Yes, because I wasn't going to solve anything by standing around the castle."

"What if something bad happened?"

"Well nothing bad did happen."

"Well what if it did? I mean come on mate so many things could go wrong right now like-"

"You spend too much time with your nose in books Merlin. If you didn't have all that knowledge in your head do you know what you'd be?"

"King Arthur?"

His majesty narrows his eyes at the warlock.

"Happy Merlin! You would be happy…and less anxious. Come on there's a whole arsenal of woman in there. What could possibly go wrong?"

Arthur's hands come out as his feet make thud noises as they cross on top of the table. The king looks particularly happy with himself. Merlin slumps into a chair, he really should relax. Everything will be fine, Morgana has seen that everything will be fine…he should stop worrying.

"Merlin."

The sorcerer looks up.

"What?"

Arthur exhales.

"Ok as much as I hate the pacing and the snotty retorts I prefer them over your silence. Come on man talk, I know you're nervous but Morgana is going to be fine. I'm actually surprised it took you _three years_ of marriage before she had this child. We all know that you two can't stop…ugh…"

The king makes a disgusted face and Merlin allows himself a small smile. The mood shifts for a moment.

"I give her an anti-fertility tonic. She just stopped taking it recently."

Arthur eyes his friend.

"Why did she wait so long? I thought you two wanted children."

"We do, I just think we wanted time for just the two of us first. We didn't want to split our attention before we had too."

Arthur nods and gives Merlin an understanding look. He knows how important the time Merlin and Morgana have had alone has meant to both of them. He loves the few moments a day he gets alone with Guinevere.

As if she heard his thoughts The Queen softly enters the room, a smile on her face. She goes over to Merlin who stands up to receive her in a hug.

"Merlin how are you?"

"Oh you know…my wife is in the other room giving birth…I'm peachy." Guinevere chuckles at his rigid behavior.

"It will be all right Merlin. We have the best midwives in the kingdom in there, not to mention a few of Morgana's healing apprentices. You know she will be ok."

Merlin deflates a little.

"I know, she has _seen_ it…it's just…"

"Doesn't make it any easier, I know my friend." The king chimes in.

Arthur has come around the table to pat Merlin on the back. For a moment the sarcasm is lost and the king sympathizes with his sorcerer.

"I remember how scared I was when Guinevere was giving birth to Tom."

The queen and king pass a loving smile to one another.

"I think I was pacing more than you were, I actually didn't get much hunting done while we were out in the woods, but I knew if I stayed in the castle it would probably be worse, and I had no vision to tell me everything was going to be ok. My mother died giving birth to me, magical or otherwise, I still fear the act. I remember my mind just kept telling me to pray that she would be alright, she would not end up like my mother."

Arthur looks over at Gwen. The fear of child birth is still hard for The King.

"When I got back I was greeted by the nurse at the gate to tell me that both The Queen and my new son were in perfect health."

Merlin forgets his troubles for a moment as he recollects the incident.

"I remember I was there with you. If I recall correctly you had destroyed my hand from the squeezing it so hard when she said 'your baby boy is healthy.'"

Suddenly Arthur can't contain himself from the memory. He moves across the room and picks Guinevere up and twirls her around, all parties in the room laughing.

"A boy on the first try, my wife is extraordinary."

For a moment Merlin presence is forgotten as Arthur brings his lips down to lock Guinevere in a passionate kiss. The warlock is about to roll his eyes when the door opens.

"Milord? Milady is asking for you."

The nurse's voice snaps them all out of the trance they entered. She is smiling, it is a good sign. Merlin sends his friends a smile and exits the room quickly.

* * *

She is tired. The sweat has finally dried on her skin. All the nurses are fussing about around her. Cleaning the baby and giving the small bundle back to the High Priestess as quickly as possible. They cover him with a soft white sheet to conceal him from the sun. Tears are threatening to spill from Morgana's eyes as she holds her son, the overwhelming emotion that he is finally here hitting her suddenly.

A moment later the door opens and Merlin enters. His breath catches in his throat when his eyes land on Morgana, he cannot move. She is breathtaking, she may have on no makeup, and her hair may be sticking to her forehead, but she is glowing, and has once again rendered him speechless. Luckily, he recovers quicker than he used to. He crosses the room and leans over the side of the bed, tears threatening his eyes.

_Hello my love_.

He kisses her brow and brushes back her sweat stained hair. She takes his hand, the smile on her face sparkles. The nurses around them swoon at the scene. Morgana sends them a look and they quickly get the hint and scurry out, leaving the three alone together.

"How are you feeling Morgana?"

He is kissing her knuckles. He knows she must be exhausted. A blanket is covering her chest, and he hopes his new son is under the sheet, and not with the nurses.

"I am very, very tired. You must rub my feet for making me go through such a horrific experience."

Merlin smiles.

"I made you go through this experience? I feel as if I'm being blamed for this."

"You are, and rightfully so, I was cursing your name as I pushed."

He softly smiles and then tenderly kisses her brow.

"I will gladly be responsible for this my love."

She sighs in contempt.

"Do you wish to see him?"

Merlin nods, he is anxious to lay eyes on his son.

She lifts the blanket and nestled next to her breast is the smallest babe Merlin has ever seen. He is freshly washed, but still red. His ten little fingers and toes move softly, he is gurgling and snuggling closer to Morgana. Merlin has to close his eyes in an attempt to not cry, he does not wish to be teased by his wife anymore today.

"Morgana, he is perfect."

She smiles softly at him.

"I'd like to think so. He does get his dashing good looks from his father."

Merlin can't stop staring at his son. A few stray tears win out and move down his cheek.

"Do you wish to hold him?"

He is a little nervous, but takes a breath and nods. It is awkward holding a baby for the first time, adjusting their head to make sure they are perfectly positioned in your arms. They are so fragile you fear they will break. Yet, with his son in his arms, the official manifestation of his union with his wife, he feels stronger than he has in a long time. Her hand is on his arms rubbing up and down as they gaze at their son. Balinor's small hand comes out and grasps at Merlin's finger, his big blue eyes matching his father's, he did not believe in love at first sight until this moment.

"He's beautiful Morgana."

He looks back at his wife, fatigue setting in. He moves to sit on the pillows with her, Morgana's delicate hand coming to touch the infant.

"I love you Morgana. Thank you for bringing our son into this world."

She smiles at him.

"I love you as well Merlin. I would return the sentiment but that was quite horrific."

He laughs lightly and slowly kisses her on the lips, fatigue is slowly settling in on his wife and her eyes get heavy as she slowly drifts off on his shoulder. He kisses her once more on her temple for good measure. He cannot do much more for the time being, but for his son he can wait, two months is nothing.

* * *

She is sitting in her chambers, rocking back and forth as she hums and coos to Balinor. She is staring at the window as the babe nestles close to her breast, only two and a half months old. There are flowers everywhere, the soft sent of lilacs, marigolds, roses, lilies, and every other flower Merlin could find fills the room. She hums more at the comforting scent. She looks to her right. A parchment addressed the 'Morgana High Priestess of Camelot' sits on her vanity. It is a congratulation letter from the lords up north. She hums more and looks down at her son again, the softest smile adorning her lips.

"I am so happy I came back to Camelot, Balinor."

As the words pass her lips she feels the flowers shift, their pollen swirling around her head. She looks forward at herself in her mirror, and remembers. This is the moment, this is her vision. On a lazy afternoon with her babe, no real significance in the day, her vision takes place. She closes her eyes as the tears pour down her cheeks.

"I love you so, so much my baby Balinor."

She holds him close and kisses his round cheek, he gurgles in response, his small hands coming up to catch any loose strands of hair. A second later Merlin walks in. The smile on his face drops a little as he sees Morgana cry silent tears. He rushes to her side immediately, kneeling down next to her chair.

"Morgana, my love what is wrong?"

He rubs Balinor's head, checking him for any problems, before he looks up at his wife's eyes. She is smiling through her tears.

"It has happened Merlin." His brow scrunches up in response.

She shifts so she can place her hand on his cheek.

"My vision, it has come to pass."

Merlin's eyes widen and then a glorious smile takes over his features. He swoops in to kiss her as her tears dry and he slowly takes their son from her arms. He sits on the side of the bed with his boy and she moves from her chair to sit next to her husband, and to rub at one of Balinor's feet.

"I told you it was a good dream Morgana."

She sighs on his shoulder and he kisses her crown.

"My dream feels like…"

_Redemption._

**_Fin. _  
**

**ITS OVER! WOOHOO! Ok woohoo for me cuz I finally got it all out haha. Thought I'd end with her vision, coming a little full circle from the whole thing. I got a little Arwen lovin in there...their just too cute not to write about:) Anyway, update! I actually have eight very long chapters almost completed for Unwelcomed Arrangements. They will be going up a lot slower though but do not fret! I hit a road block but an amazing person on Tumblr is helping me out so I can get things smoothed over and put it up. I will have the second chapter up, either right after posting this or a little later, so do not fret my loyal reviewers/followers! Anywho, I am glad ya'll enjoyed this story, it was a lot of fun to write. The Bliss universe will take a back seat for a little bit, I'm getting a little too excited with my new fic so I'm going to focus on that:) If I get any prompts though, I so promise to post more. **

**As always, thank you for following me on this journey, I am so happy to write this. As always, I love to hear from you guys! Happy reading! :)**


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